idk. idk. idk. idk why am i even writing this. he won’t read this anyway. not because he’s busy but he just wont. even before his ojt, i don’t think he opens this. nvm. ill just let it all out.
i think the problem is that we don’t argue. weird right?
isn’t arguing a bad thing?
but there are thoughts inside me that remain unsaid.
thoughts that slowly devour my whole being.
and that someday will just shut all these feelings up.
the problem is with me, that i can’t let go of things not discussed.
i can’t forgive without justifying why and why not to forgive.
justice is what i am trying to exercise.
i need an apology not just to settle things up.
i need an apology because he knows why he’s wrong.
an apology because he knows he’ll try to correct them.
i was not demanding, i was just trying to find out why things changed.
i mean yes, situations change, things get tougher, and so does him that faces such challenges. but i mean, he got time bragging all his alien stuff to me, words that i don’t even understand. well of course, i’m glad of what is happening to him but please i took accountancy and not culinary arts, the heck are those french terms that make my nose bleed all the time? can we just speak RELEVANT discussions? i am proud and excited for your career but hey i don’t drown you with my accounting lingo anyway. yes ojt, it is such an awesome thing. i do appreciate it a lot. but what makes me feel like this is whenever i start to tell you what’s been going on with me, you don’t even show interest at all. like i also got stories to tell but how could i continue if the buffer’s already ignored? :( i feel sad not being to share with you my stories. i feel even worse because i feel like you aren’t interested at all. ok. you’re tired. effin tired so you don’t notice my stories but why the heck can you spill yours? ako magsstart ng kwento ko, your reply is different. out of my topic, OK? OK TALAGA YUN. but then you start telling yours. how respectful is that? and time lapses ng reply is really outstanding. i mean just please don’t talk to me if not tuloy-tuloy. you’re doing something and so do i. i don’t want the 24/7 type either pero un man lang 30 minutes na tayo lang magkausap? kasi nawawala yung momentum eh. di ba? nakakawalang gana. sa pagod mo maghapon hindi ako nagdedemand. pero sana ngayong wala kang pasok isang tuloy-tuloy na sensible na usapan man lang? nakakapag-fb ka nga ng tuloy-tuloy eh. o kaya sbihin mo sakin kung may gagawin ka para hindi ako nag-iintay tingin ng tingin sa phone ko di ba? hindi naman tayo textmates eh. pag-uusap yun. usap ng matino. kahit pagod naman, pwedeng mag-usap ng matino.saglit lang naman di ba. yung may ako lang, ako lang yung bida sa 30 minutes pwede ba yun? and to think na kanina pa ko nagkakaganito, he won’t even bother to fix this. BAT GANOOOON PARATI?! he’ll just act normal, act like nothing happened. ano ba yun. something’s wrong nga so it needs fixing. may time naman para pag-usapan pero hindi eh. ayaw ng away? ayaw ng argument? pero ano mas nagbburst na lang ako inside!! im not a warfreak! ill participate sa isang passive na discussion at least man lang mabawasan yung dinadamdam ko :’C kung pwede lang ganun di ba? DI BA KRISTINE? DI BA? SHIT. HOW PATHETIC THIS IS. THAT I DON’T EVEN HAVE THE CHANCE TO TELL THIS TO HIM.
I’m not a control-freak girlfriend. neither am i a super dependent one. but i mean at least once a week when he’s free too, we can talk. talk sensible topics, and he’ll let me speak of my individual life too. i think i ain’t losing a lover, im losing a friend :( a friend that will listen to me countless times. now what i got is a korean radio jock who just kept on talking and talking Hangul.
2. Ma Mon Luk
3. Ice skating
4. ayala museum
5. mind museum
6. rcbc museum
wanting to go sooner :( lots of stuff to do, got no money at all -____-
“Paano natin nagagawang mapuno ang isang album ng tayong dalawa lang?! isang hapon sa library napakaraming pictures mga 60. paano kaya’t wala tayong social life! HAHAHAHA”
pero kahit di tayo magkatabi sa bus nung art tour :’C kahit ang awkward mo sa tawag sa cellphone :’C kahit lagi kang caught in the act sa fail tulaley-nail biting moments mo :’C suuuuuper thank you! thank you sa pag-iintay sa’kin pumili/umorder ng meal! thank you sa pagsama sa’kin maglakad kahit pagod kana simula dorm niyo lagpas ust hanggang morayta, mula condo niyo hanggang school na sa UE ang daan, thank you so much sa pakikinig ng love rants ko na wala ring pupuntahan :))), and thank you sa pagtitiyaga mo sa moodswing ko :ppp so eto na babatiin na kita:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY Scyla Cassandra Gacis !
i wish you all desires of your good and chubby heart!! stay as you are, wag ka magbago! :> cute and cuddly na stuff toy ni ar-ar haha :)) malayo na bahay niyo mejo magji-jeep kana, ngayong 19 kana, sana di kana kabado pagnagco-commute :’C
ILOVEYOUSOOOOOMUCH KERIBELS! AYAW MONG SWEET AKO PERO CLINGY TALAGA AKETCH! KISS! MWAH MWAH! BESO! HUUUUUG! HUUUUG! TAKE CARE! GOD BLESS YOU!
TRADITION NA ITEY! PERO DI AKO/TAYO MAGSASAWA KAKA-COLLAGE OK? HAHA! SO NEXT YEAR, JANUARY AH. HAHAHA!
buti pa ang biglaang lakad, laging tuloy :))
all started with such a boring aft. i was on p4 to switch off the light we left last week. cherst texted me that she’s bored. i told her to gatecrash dors’ pad but it all turned to gatecrashing mine instead :))
to swim is our real objective but cherst forgot her cam’s effin SD. we lost our momentum so we just had an effin and freakin’ FT. alay-lakad as always!! remember trinoma to philcoa? =)))) curse kuya of save more, loljk. he didn’t believe that we’re no longer minors! so we dropped our groceries and went to hi-top instead.
we baked brownies! http://instagram.com/p/YhxZTLPAXO/
get drunk, lol. http://instagram.com/p/YiRZRVPAbu/
then painted our nails :3
we slept at i think 3:30am then got up around 6. i went to school to attend my humanities class. i missed the additional 5points given to the students on time :( hahaha
then i went back home to prepare for our swimming :3 http://instagram.com/p/Ykcp1svARl/
t’was an awesoooooome two-productive-day well-spent with the girls ♥ love ‘em all! haha ayala lang :)))
March 23, 2013 | 9:00am - 1:00pm | DLSU Razon Sports Complex
idk how to start because this story needs no buffer!!! the excitement was on, momentum’s up, everyone was sooo hyper! ♥
8:30 am I and ate arrived at the venue. there were long lines and a lot of people already. Around 9:10 when the ground floor was already crowded, the nice security guys allowed us fans to go up. since there’s only 1 elevator to serve at most 200 people, most of us took the stairs. Gosh, the way up to the 9th floor was soooo exhausting but t’was worth it :> i and chep secured a nice and comfortable front seat at the bleachers. i also got to hold gumabao’s hand! ♥
the first six players on attendance include ara galang and abi maraño :) the team captain led the prayer followed by the welcome message from their priest. coach ramil was also present :) there were three games -balloon something, newspaper dance, and egg catching. we weren’t able to join. most of the participants ages 10-16, are highschool students, and are really really unstoppable. some of them even jumped off the railings of the bleachers. there were also prizes for both the non-winners and winners :)
afterwards, when the team’s already complete, they offered us a dance number led by abi and michele :> then fans lined up for the autograph signing and picture taking which was really tiresome. luckily, a nice ate from the dlsu office made friends with us and we swerved on the bottleneck area :)) shaked hands with yeye! oh my :”> free snacks distribution followed :>
i soooo ♥ ‘em. like they really appreciate how much the fans acknowledge them plus the school is also considerate. the security officers are really accomodating and the hosts made sure we’re comfortable. they tried their best to facilitate the run of the programs tho some really wild fans were hard to supervise.
may God continue blessing all of them :)
been through several misunderstandings and arguments lately.
here comes the j.co thing, the milktea thing, the effin section 1 thing.
but despite all these, what keeps us still is the willingness to talk and listen, the initiative to discuss what has been the real event behind every issue, and the love that forgives and forgets :) ♥
nevertheless, good times are still dominant! :>
dated for quite several times these past two months :)
rob tiangge ♥
bigCup P.campa ♥
sm manila, twilight :>
- and whenever it’s possible for us to go home together, he waits for my dismissal :> ♥ milk tea, calamares :3
- he visited me twice and brought along some milk tea! he even went to P.Campa bigCup just to buy me one because he knows i like it lotssss :3
- we exchanged purses :3 then had puto bumbong, told stories, laugh along, cuddled around and kisssed a lot! hahahaha KV :”> ♥
I love my boyfriend so much :)
I feel so blessed for having in my life that despite the stress and downfalls i have in school, i still manage to be optimistic. We got future plans ahead of us and may everything be upon God’s grace :)
Thank you Lord ♥
CHEERS TO A HAPPY ONE YEAR! :)
march 10, 2013 -we celebrated the day we became official :) we wanted a simple one. i just thought of a nice sunny aft at the park, us talking ‘bout the whole year, play & cuddle around, and just simply make each other happy. well, it somehow turned out to be that way tho it took us quite a long discussion first.
he was sick the night before. he had some allergies from the food he ate at his friend’s debut. he told me he can’t celebrate with me. disappointed, i just yea accepted it. i was also worried about him so i just went to lagro to interview ate cristine. but as i was about to prepare for my schoolwork, he told me that we’d meet & celebrate together. since i already texted pastor, i first went to lagro. tan&i agreed to see each other at 11 but i arrived 1 hr late. he was so damn mad. i can’t blame him tho, he was worried about me. i apologized ofcourse but it took him quite a few minutes to forgive me :)) then he gave me a boquet of roses :) i love it lotss!
then to where will we go next is a big issue. idk what was on his mind but im pretty sure he really don’t wanna go on a park or wasn’t really happy at all. his face was like :| no uhm actually like °_° well idk i bursted out in tears. i think i deserve a happy celebration, that despite my approaching finals exam, i gave off a day for review. it has been 1 yr and what i got were a boquet of roses and this °_° i mean if he can’t really go w/ his condition, we shouldn’t have met. i told him to just rest at home & i did gave him some medicine but he insisted yet idk how he’s going to manage w/ his °_° face.
but after a meaningful argument, we headed off to wildlife. there we spoke of different things & discussed how we’ve been. when the rain came, we went to ever since he had never been there before.
t’was quite a happy day with him :) i just think i was not convinced of such moment because i was expecting much. of all of my past relationships, this was the first time i bought&prepared a gift myself. nevertheless, what’s important is at every end of the day, we’re still. and in God’s grace, there’ll be more anniversaries to come :)
when i got home from school, i immediately looked for papa knowing that he arrived already. mama spilled he was at the kitchen hiding from me. as i walk towards the light switch there, he picked and lifted me up! DawnZulueta ang peg! :)) here are our pictures the past days :)
￼at ever gotesco commonwealth, just bought some groceries then dined at pizza hut.
at quezon memorial circle :> trying to be fit eh :))
* [insert pic]
from crossroad 77 to ever :)